“I’m addicted to chocolate,” said Debra with a smile. “I have a special drawer, the deep kind, in my closet, that no one is allowed to touch,” she explained. “This is serious,” I thought to myself. “I wake up in the morning, thinking about chocolate, and my last thought before I go to sleep, is chocolate. I think I tasted all the different brands in the world.” She added. Debra was very slim, attractive, and married with kids. She didn’t like that the addiction controlled her life. We decided to use inner child synergy to get to the root of things.
I put her under a relaxed state and asked her to recall an early childhood memory that would explain the mystery.
“I’m four years old, the middle daughter. I’m a happy kid. We are well off, the parents get along well. I love my father and I feel like I’m his favorite. He travels for work, a few times a year. Maybe five days at a time, but I miss him terribly.” She became emotional. “He is about to come home after his trip. I’m in the living room, anxiously waiting for him by the door, with my older brother. My Dad opens the door. We jump on him, and he hugs and kisses us.
He brings in two heavy suitcases. We know the drill. We open the gray one in the middle of the room. It is packed with goods such as shoes and clothes, but what I like the most – the exotic chocolates. Swiss, Belgium, German. You name it, they are all there. The chocolates are packaged so beautifully, individually wrapped in a golden paper. It is like art.
My brother and I split the treasure evenly. My Dad put so much love and intention into choosing these for us. Each time he brings new kinds and brands of chocolate!” She was beaming.
I asked her to explain her association with chocolate. “Daddy is back!. I’m so glad. I love him so much! I’m not close to my mom. She’s strict. Daddy spoils me and takes me on adventures.” she helped to put the pieces together.
“What does chocolate mean to you today?” I inquired. She explained that the chocolate symbolized her father’s love for her, being the favorite, feeling safe and appreciated. “Wow!” I thought to myself. “No wonder she gravitates towards chocolate many times a day. Don’t we all want to feel safe and loved and appreciated? Debra had a unique “fix” to feel that: chocolate!”
I did healing, disconnecting the association to chocolate and introducing other resources for self-validation and emotional support. When Debra came back to room awareness, she said: “you know, my chocolate drawer is the exact dimensions of the suitcase! Wide and deep and comforting!” I smiled.
A few days later I called to check on her. “The next day, habitually, I open the drawer in the morning. I looked at my stash. I felt nothing. This is weird. Am I sick? I closed it. Tried to imagine all the goodness I collected there. I open it again. No desire, nothing special, just a curated international collection of chocolates. I had to force myself to eat one, to make sure I was OK.” She shared in astonishment. “Are you OK?” I asked. “Now I’m just a regular person, not an addict” she clarified. “I can eat it. I enjoy chocolate, but I’m not obsessing over it anymore.”
